The Boston Red Sox: Defenders of the 2004 World Championship!! "Whoever plunges into his experiences with the momentum of hope, will remember so that he cannot forget." - Soren Kierkegaard.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

The shiny-ness of the brand new baseball season is sort of starting to wear off now and I finally felt my first twinge of Red Sox-related anger tonight.

1. Fuck Blaine Neal. Yes, he had two strikeouts tonight, and yes, one of them was A-Fraud, and no, he did not give up any runs. But I still think he sucks. Putting Blaine Neal into a game is like running a white flag up the fucking pole. And what kind of name is Blaine Neal - did your parents pick that out of a fucking Jackie Collins novel? Gross.

2. The Sox are pulling a "Red Sox" by being unable to capitalize on walks and by leaving men in scoring position. Jaret Wright is a train wreck of a human being, but you'd think he was the Dalai Fucking Lama if you look at the third inning on my scoresheet: one double, three walks and only one run scored - on a sac-fly, no less. Lame.

3. No matter how hard I try, I can never, ever beat Mike at the Player of the Game contest. Tonight I picked Manny, because I figure hey - how long can that guy go on sucking like this? Meanwhile, Mike goes with the safer pick in Trot Nixon. Needless to say, I lose. Trot hits a homer and walks three times, while Manny has a double, a walk and a fly-out, rounding out his evening with what would have been two magnificent ground-outs-into-double-plays had there been a man on first base.

4. Renteria. Somebody get this guy a hooker or something.

5. Schilling? Good first five innings, but the guy isn't God - he should have come out after the fifth. Normally, giving up three hits and two runs in an inning after one has only given up three hits the previous four innings isn't a sign of impending doom...unless it happens to be one's very first start of the year and one has already thrown in excess of eighty pitches. But, out he comes in the sixth to give up two homers for a combined three runs. Shrug. I told Tito it wasn't a good idea, but he didn't listen to me. He did listen to me about the Bellhorn/day off thing, though.

But, there is a silver lining to this cloud. The Sox may have lost 5-2 to the Yankees in a very agonizing fashion, but no matter what happens, no one can take this memory away from me:

It's never going to stop making me laugh. Posted by Hello