The Boston Red Sox: Defenders of the 2004 World Championship!! "Whoever plunges into his experiences with the momentum of hope, will remember so that he cannot forget." - Soren Kierkegaard.

Monday, August 16, 2004

Terry Francona, I want some answers.

1. Why in the fuck would someone rest Bill Mueller (in favor of Ricky Gutierrez) against a team that is competetive for the AL Wild Card spot - the same spot the Sox are trying to win - when Mueller could just wait and rest tomorrow, when the Sox are playing the ridiculously awful Toronto Blue Jays? For that matter, why sit Kevin Millar, who has been smoking hot at the plate, for Gaybe Krapler? Or Doug Mientoaewradgn, for that matter.

2. Let's talk some third base. Millar is on first base. Manny Ramirez is on third in one of those motorized shopping carts he stole from a Safeway, lit up on prescription painkillers and wearing Lynn Jones's glasses. There are no outs. Cabrera taps a grounder right back to the pitcher. Sveum sends the runner around. What in the fuck is wrong with him?

3. The game is tied. You pull _____(insert name-of-starter-just-cresting-100-pitches here) and bring in _______(insert name or names of tired, old, used up relief pitchers that have given up a shit ton of home runs this season here.) Everyone in the entire fucking world knows what's going to happen except for you. How is this possible?

4. The Sox are down three runs in the eighth, two men on base, and you pinch hit Kevin Millar for Doug Mienasdlkagaz. What in the fuck were you thinking? (This is a trick question, as it was actually the right thing to do.)

5. Kevin Millar makes it on to load the bases and you pinch-hit Dave Fucking Roberts for Gaybe Krapler, while Dave McCarty (who has already proved himself to be clutch in these situations) stays on the bench. Did any of your mother's children live? True or false: "If I wanted to put Dave Roberts in the game that badly, I could have had him pinch run (not hit, RUN,) for David Ortiz at third."

6. True or False: "I am a complete and utter fucking idiot with sheepshit for brains who probably deserves to lose his job and wind up sleeping in a refridgerator box under a pier on a cold and windy beach."

Sidenote: Good for Cabrera for going 3-5. Too bad you couldn't have gotten another hit in the ninth inning, but as they say, you can't squeeze blood from a turnip. Nice effort.
Sidenote#2: Until further notice, Manny is the most unclutch player on the team. I'm tired of seeing this guy fucking whiff all the time with men in scoring position. "RBIMachine" my ass. He didn't even look like he was making decent swings yesterday, much less decent contact. Ya, I know he hit a homerun the day before, but by and large he's been stinking it up since after the All-Star Break and my patience has finally snapped. I actually feel guilty being mad at Manny, but I'm pretty much mad at everyone right now.